Tag: spliff

Head / Shed

Reading Time: 2 minutes

Mrs R.,

My fucking mate has got a fucking head in his fucking microwave, he keeps taking slices off when he needs them. There are two fucking more in his fucking fridge. Mind you he cooked us up a nice bit of snap in the galley tonight, I don’t quite know what was in it but it was nice. The spider on my lamp has just caught a fly twice the size of it and has taken it home to have a scoff. He was on about making a film about us lot, the firm, psycho’s etc etc but I can’t remember much about it ‘cos we were off our fucking maps. The thing is that you can’t improve on reality in a fucking situation like that, I mean, two fucking heads in the fucking fridge.… Read more

Munter

Reading Time: 13 minutes

Hello boss,

What about wormy meat then, eh? Meat with worms in it. Lollipops children. Peek-A-Boo-Man has complained about my ‘incense’ again (I told him it was incense), very nicely and politely though (he’s softly spoken and has a ‘posh’ accent), so I might have to deck the cunt. No, violence isnt nice, so I will just fucking ignore him.

Two chickens. I’m not seeing with my eyes, I’m seeing with my mind. Had a beakfull of charlie, it’s very nice, rock, it’s a cunt chopping it. Gray day, fine drizzle falling. Shining in my head, I need it ‘cos I can feel the intensity of my ‘X-mass experience’ coming and I’m going to have to charge through it like a fucking bull and not come up for breath till January.… Read more